I share moments with different people now. New people. And the more I share with them, the more I discover.
“You bring out the weird in me,” she says. “And I bring out the weird in you.” I thought at 27, I had myself figured out. But then you meet someone new and there’s another piece of yourself you didn’t see before.
There’s a piece of Him you didn’t see before.
I get in my head when I catch my reflection in his sunglasses because I wonder if what I see is the way he’s seeing me. Usually, he lets me leave my overthinking at the door. I’ve never seen myself live in the moment before–not like this. Not the jump-off-moving trains kind of living.
“I haven’t blogged as much since I met you,” I say. The truth is all the new relationships are already too much exposure. Too much vulnerability.
I travel back to my childhood home for eight days and it feels like we’re all teenagers again, but I start to notice differences about them. They’ve met different people. They’ve lived different lives.
“We have to expect the people in our lives to change,” she says as we sit cross-legged on the grass on a Tuesday night. She says it like it’s the secret to long-term friendship and lifelong love.
And long-lasting faith. Faith that goes in the hall of fame. Faith is the conviction that the gospel brings change.
And perhaps the best advice I received this year is to be curious.
To start conversations with curiosity.
To get on the phone with my family members.
To handle confrontation.
I open the page in the Bible and read the passage that makes my cheeks burn and my tongue get dry.
Curiosity is admitting that there is always something you might not know. It’s the secret passage to humility.
“The love I have for my nephew is something I never imagined I’d experience,” she tells me.
And that gives me hope that there’s other love we haven’t experienced yet. There’s joy we haven’t known. There’s growth we haven’t felt. There’s beauty we haven’t seen.
But we will one day, perhaps–if we’re only curious enough to keep our eyes open for it.
“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1